Retro shinobi smut – best gift idea of the year.

Pink Eiga is a company that cares about its smut, smut that was lovingly crafted by people who cared, back in a day when people cared about what they whacked it to…

Ya’ hear that, you damn kids with yer interwebs full of cosplay orgies shot on iPhones! When it was FILM, it was ART!!!

Well, maybe an early 80′s ninja version of groper train soft porn wasn’t exactly high art, but there are whole categories of Japanese sex films that answer to a higher artistic calling, and some of the talent behind the camera went on to legendary, even Oscar-winning status.

Before directing masterpieces like When the Last Sword is Drawn and the 2009 Best Foreign-Language Oscar winner Departures, Yojiro Takita helped define the ‘molester’ or ‘groper train’  niche of pink films. You just don’t get that sort of cross-industry latitude in the States. His Sexy Timetrip Ninjas is a rather historically literate comedy that mixes ninja gags and public transportation sex.

Sarutobi Sasuke and his female nemesis Kagero get thrown forward in time to modern Tokyo, where the arcane shadow arts of centuries past come in handy for things like covert train groping and wining TV talent shows, while modern comforts like adult theaters and vibrators are embraced for the futuristic miracles they truly are.

There’s enough wackiness here to elevate STN out of the mere porn range, into exploitive, if not cheeky, comedy. It was shot on film, and has that sadly long-gone 70′s porn feel – a real story, quality photography, entertainment value above and beyond the money shots. Could be a mixed-company party film, if you mix with the right company.

Ninja Pussy Cat was made 20 years later, and is seed for the the wave of kunoichi softporn you see out now – Ninja Vixens, Lady Ninja Kasumi, Lady Ninja Kaede,  I Was a Teenage Ninja, etc. It is much better than all of those – prettier stars, better production values, the whole bit. NPC is definitely more in the Friday night Cinemax vein than anything retro or mainstream, more porn than say Kunoichi: Lady Ninja, but with better ninja stuff than the Vixens line. Calling a film the best of the current ninja girl fare is like lauding the word’s tallest dwarf, but if any of these direct-to-vid flicks gave you even half-a-chub, NPC is well worth checking out.

Now, I don’t want to totally alienate the community of Japanese soft-porn cuties (because I’m sure they’re reading…), so if you are going to score one of the current crop, Ninja She-Devil is probably the one. Lead ‘actress’ Yumi Asami is positively bodacious…

So I’m just gonna say it, there’s no better stocking stuffer than subtitled shinobi soft smut!

Sexy Timetrip Ninjas official page is here and TWITCH reviewed it here.

Ninja Pussy Cat official page is here and once again TWITCH provides a review.

I also recommend another genre-bending piece of peculiar pinku from Pink Eiga, S&M Hunter. These cats are an indie label that needs to stick around, so support them dammit!!!

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Posted in Film and TV and Sword Girls December 15, 2010 at 12:08 am.

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